so, i’m hoping you never see this.. i probably shouldn’t even type it, but my crazydumbinsane side is forcing me to.
i really wish that i could explain to you why i feel the way i do. and i really wish the way i felt didn’t stress you out and cause frustration like you said.
i wish i could say that it doesn’t hurt
i wish i could tell you i’m sorry, and i’ll give up easily..
but i can’t help it.
it’s like this…
looking at you, i know that everything i’ll ever want is in the reflection of my eyes
talking to you, i hope that what we say is remembered forever for you, because it is for me
dreaming of you, i wish that waking up was merely an option, and that i could play a role in your dreams as well
writing about you, i can’t lie to myself, but i can’t give up, even if i stand no chance of
being with you, i can’t help but smile as my heart forgets to beat





i’m sorry.
but you’re wrong..you ARE important to me.

love and stuff like it,
Courtney

meh. :(

:) say it’s average. DO IT.

can’t I appreciate what I have…

why…

do I need HIM so bad…

why…

won’t I give this one enough of a chance…

why

am I so in love with someone who hurts me…

why…

can’t I love the one who wants to heal me…

why…

do I question this at all.

justincousson-deactivated201204 asked: Awkward accomplished. How was your weekend? What's new and exciting?

weekend was allright. what’s new and exciting… :o i’m writing a ten minute one act with some friends about an intense ACID TRIP. it is going to blow some minds.

how about you, my awkward friend? What is new with you?

justincousson-deactivated201204 asked: Hey, you sound grand. This can be arranged. Whatever do I have to do?

oh dear… i have to say… i completely forgot what i wanted arranged.. :0 zero face… whatever did i ask??

good song… and the title describes my current situation… i have not forgotten you, tumblr!

Life has just been a bit too intense for me to do anything but study and hate my life lately.
For real. Oh yeah, and text people. Ughh. What I wouldn’t do for a galloon of ice cream right now. :/

This is my life for the past three months:

Start cross country, fall in love with a boy named Michael.
Hang out with this boy often, date him, and fall even more in love.
Get in trouble with parents for constantly defying them, and get forced to break up with Michael.
Of course, I could still date him behind their backs. Or so I thought. He decides he doesn’t want a relationship his senior year.
I spend the next two months on the brink of insanity.. feigning my happiness.
Not very easy to do. People ask questions, but I manage to pull off the facade so long as Michael randomly does things to show he’s still into me.
It takes a lot of effort, and I’m still in the insanity stage.
Guys, one second, he’s looking at me like I’m the greatest thing on earth, and the next, he looks like he wants me to disappear forever.
Hah.
Quote of the month: Can I have you but not have you??
Yeah, because I totally know what that means.
Sigh.
Does anyone know what I should do?

(via styleismusic)